The Land of Areca Nut

Well, I'm in Channagiri. The Land of Areca Nut. Where Areca Nut seems important when you say it like that. Along the road before you reach the measly hospital, you'll see people drying areca nuts on wide sheets on the ground in front of their houses. The husks of the nuts are kept in a pile near some random (random to me, maybe not so random to the locals) plantation, just by the roadside.

Why am I here.

Well that's an irony isn't it, seeing there is definitely a place more rural than Davanagere (which I already thought already considered rural) and they decided to send some of us here to serve the people. Haha. I'll take it as a joke anytime. Patients vary from nil to 5 to as many as 22.

I live for the scenery and the journey.

We passed through housing colonies, farms, paddy fields, rural schools, water channels, lakes, old, unused bridges.

Everytime I see a house or some schools I tried to imagine what they're doing, is it important for them to have bath everyday, or is it more important to milk the goats before letting them off to feed on some grassy fields. What are the plays of those schoolgirls in pink, and is their teacher a localite, or some town lady who had been forced to work in the rural part because she had an argument with her boss early in life. What are those uncles who sit around the rooster doing, betting for some meager money? So many questions, so many feelings, even my array of songs in my Walkman can't shut my mind from thinking of the possibilities. I am wide awake, and somehow I feel jealous of the sleeping people around me, heads lulling about along the bumps of the road the bus took.

Everytime, I look high to the fort and wonder, what do they need to protect here in this peaceful part of the country once upon a time.

Oh well. 8 more days to go.

Most people hate the journey, but I don't.

I feel like the Land of Areca Nut had my mind buzzing more than I ever felt throughout the year, and I'm glad.

I'm glad I have these 15 days.

How Do I Tell You

How do I tell you
I like your awkward smile?
The one that crinkles around your eyes
Flashing teeth across a mile?

How do I tell you
Your restlessness is so adorbs?
The way you question about yourself
I want to answer it
I want it solved

How do I tell you
I like it when you're around?
Your sarcastic jokes that's supposed to hurt
Becomes my playing ground

How do I tell you
I'm not sure what this is?
But the world seems so glum and doomed
When nothing came from you?

Now I'm just rambling
All my disfigured thoughts
And to the hell cares about rhymes went
I like you and I don't
I don't know how to tell

How do I tell you.

This is so disorganized and unattractive and probably would make a sappy song too.

How do I tell you.

Girls VS Boys

"Why do you think they call girls- GIRLS? Because they giggle. Get it? Girls? Giggles?"

"Then can't boys giggle too?"

"Boys chuckle."

"Then that's unfair! They should've call it boggles."

"Now you're just being ridiculous."

Seloka Malam Cinta

Seloka malam cinta
Membongkar loker luka
Madu bersalut sutera
Manis lekit jiwa
Rimas, lengas
Tewas.

Seloka malam cinta
Dini pagi sejurus memecah
Keseribusatuan yang makin parah.

Seloka malam cinta
Kedengaran indah
Padahal berpusing dalam satu jiwa cuma
Berbolak balik seperti panah
Dibusurkan tali yang basah.

Ah, gundah
Entah sampai bila kan ketemu sudah.

Tak Sabar Mahu Pulang.

Kerana suatu apa pun tak akan dapat menahan gejolak kemahuanmu.

Saban tahun kau mengira waktu
Bila detik-detik di bumi asing ini akan berlalu
Terasa lambat terasa berat
Tetap jua kau tak tergugat

Sedikit saja lagi, bahkan, kan kau akhirinya
Jiwa sudah mahu meletup tak sabar persisnya
Lagu-lagu semua bernada semboyan lagaknya
Gempita belerang memancar
Anak rantau kan pulang
Tak dihantui bayang kan pergi lagi

Bagaimana enam tahun berlalu sekelip mata?
Gelar-gelarmu juga sudah berganti
Masa depanmu tetap asyik tak pasti.

Bandara negaraku, sabarlah menanti dalam dua purnama lagi.

Memanfaatkan 'Waktu-waktu Emas'

Aku sering menerima cadangan untuk masuk peraduan menulis ini dan itu dari sahabat handai dan adik-beradik aku sendiri. Walaupun tak pernah memenangi apa-apa peraduan ataupun menyiarkan karya aku di mana-mana media cetak, saban tahun ada aje adik aku tag aku di twitter atau facebook atau whatsapp. Terima kasihlah sebab percayakan aku ada bakat menulis. Aku minta maaf juga kerana selalu malas. Aku selalu salahkan writer's block. Padahal kalau tweets aku di twitter sana dikompilasikan, agaknya dah terhasil 2 buah buku. Tapi siapa saja yang mahu baca bebelan aku. Bebelan matluthfi90 mahulah orang membacanya.

Aku dah hampir putus asa sampai lah semalam aku terbuka fail2 cerpen separuh jalan aku di laptop aku. Kebetulan buka laptop kerana nak test printer bertuah boleh pakai lagi ke tidak. Terbuka pula benda lain. Dan2 tu jugak sempat update 2 ayat dalam cerpen latest. Roommate aku yang dah lama tak nampak aku menaip menyangka aku menaip surat rasmi. Bila aku katakan aku tengah taip cerpen, dia gelak sampai hampir terkeluar air hidung. Tahulah aku tak berbakat, takperlu sampai begitu menghina aku.

Tadi aku terbaca latest post Shahkang yang menceritakan tentang teknik Golden Hours dalam penulisan. Katanya teknik ini memerlukan seorang penulis untuk tulis apa saja mengenai subjek yang diinginkan, tanpa mengambil kira soal terlupa fakta dan kesalahan tatabahasa. Kemudian barulah disunting apa jua yang ditulis/taip itu. Bagus juga fikir aku. Kalau menaip mengikut apa saja yang ada dalam otak aku ketika dan saat itu memang hebat juga. Tengok sajalah twitter aku yang tak pernah sunyi itu. Cumanya aku kadang2 terlampau perfeksyionis bila nak menghasilkan karya. Nak tunggu ilham konon2nya. Dapat dua baris lepastu simpan dalam buku nota seratus tahun sampai mereput.

InshaAllah akan dimanfaatkan. Post kali ini juga menggunakan cara golden hours. Tapi probably aku takkan sunting lah ya. Peduli apa aku. Haha.

Salam satu india dan jumpa lagi.

So, So Tired.

When you think you had something, but you don't really do,
When you think you're surrounded with people but you're really alone,
When you think you got this, but you really messed up,
When you think it's not too bad, but at a point it feels so hard to go on,

Remember, time will go by,
And it swings like a swing, and it spins like a dice,
To every hardships and toils that tripped you,
There will always be something better awaiting to pick you up.

Cheer up, and have a light in your heart,

Cz you know this too, shall pass.

#keepitup
#staystrong