Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Melompat Dunia

Diam terpempan di meja berkabus debu
Kumpulan tiga puluh tahun.

Petik jarimu!

Tergesit di lorong kecil tepi masjid kota
Seorang cilik melontar senyumnya.

Petik jarimu!

Duduk bersimpuh di tepi padang pasir, tangan berhimpun doa.

Lantas kau menutup lembar dan hentikan baca.
Eh.
Siapa kata melompat dunia-
Cuma miliknya sang adiwira?

Monday, August 25, 2014

Poem - Writing versus Reciting

I was at Sabah about two weeks ago, where I met some of my friends at a small gathering at Sabun's house in Tuaran. It was a mini reunion, you could say, if you count out my travel partner. They brought out our school magazine, named Randawi, the edition where I was one of the editorial board members. And inside, voila! A long forgotten poem of mine printed neatly on one of the pages, titled 'Sesuatu Untuk Esok'. It's funny that at the end of highschool I wrote a heartfelt poem about what would I feel about school after leaving school, and somehow, it was just so perfect for the reunion occasion. Sabun recited the poem for us despite my desperate argument, and it made me think at that time that I, myself, cannot recite a poem properly despite my ability to write one.

I think reciting and writing poems are two different businesses. I hate talking in the first place, let alone letting my guard down reciting a heartfelt poem in front of people. I prefer writing, texting, emailing, anything after talking. Talking exhaust me. And I wonder, seeing poets reciting their poems proudly in front of a bunch of people, don't they feel the same like how I feel? I prefer to hide behind my writings cz people can't see me. People tend to judge. I like to observe people and as long as my observation goes, people's judgement can be so weirdly confusing, wrong and harsh and I don't want to be at the other end where I am putting myself out there to be criticized. But so is life. We live in a community and we'll always face judgements no matter how hard we tried to hide.

I guess I'm letting my guard down a bit. Still ain't reciting one small poem.

Thursday, August 21, 2014

Yang Seperti-seperti

Seperti tahu
Seperti tidak tahu
Aku menyimpan wangian senyum
Bersama sinar mentari paling mulai
Di dalam tabung kaca berlorek nama kamu

Tapi yang seperti-seperti itu
Cuma tinggal seperti
Dan tabung kaca aku biar hanyut
Biar terdampar dengan air surut
Di mana saja ia tersangkut

Mungkin makan tahun, atau masa yang mengerumun
Tapi aku tak peduli lagi dengan mentari paling pertama
Kerana kau tak peduli pun dengan renyahnya teruja aku
Mengumpul cahaya di tabung kecil
Untuk kita.

Yang seperti-seperti
Aku leretkan
Di langit lazuardi tengah dhuha
Memohon ampun atas ketelanjuranku
Terfikir aku bakal punyai kamu.

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Ini puisi untuk Doktor Mira.

Di pagi keterjagaanmu, Mira
Disapa sejuk mentari dan hangat embun
Meraikan kejayaanmu
Sebagai seorang lagi kalangan pengantara
Kesedihan dan penyembuhan
Yang dikuasakan Tuhan.

Belum sempat lagi kau lihat airmata yang gugur dari seorang ibu
Menebar suara hati, melihat gering anakandanya
Dan kau harus saljukan bibit lara itu
Dengan senyuman paling menawan dan jelita
Untuk mereka percaya yang harapan masih ada,
Seolah tak ada satu Kesedihan pun bertamu sama di hati engkau.

Ah, pedulikan semesta dulu di hening dini ini
Kerana yang menanti di Sungai Petani
Sudah bersusah-susah memikirkan juadah apa
Buat santapan Sang Anak Si Tuan Doktor
Di pengakhiran minggu nanti.

Bangga aku tak terungkap padamu
Terjumpanya kita di rumah enam belas, di umur lapan belas, masih berbekas
Dan ketawa masih terbit di jelamanya aku setiap kali menatap wajah-wajah naif kita
Yang merasakan terbang ke India mencari sesuap ilmu
Adalah perkara paling besar dan paling agung di seluruh belantara dunia.

Sayangku, jangan kau lupa sahabatmu ini
Kala kesibukan menjelma dan kau perih lagi
Kau runsing lagi dengan segala entri dan sentri-
Selitkan ruang doa untuk aku
Dan semoga saja kita menjadi adiwira
Yang berjaya fikirnya, meski dunia terus menggila.

Selamat menjadi doktor, Nur Amirah.

Nota kaki: Nur Amirah Ayob adalah seorang sahabatku, berasal dari Sungai Petani, Kedah. Periang dan sering melakukan typing error secara luar sedar. Amat baik hati sepertimana ibu bapanya. Merupakan rakan sebilik di Kolej Teknologi Timur, Sepang ketika kami menjalani Cambridge A-Levels.

Dr. Nur Amirah Ayob kini adalah seorang doktor dengan ijazah MBBS daripada Manipal University.

Tuesday, August 5, 2014

Joblessness

At home right now, for the 2 months hols,
2 weeks had passed tho, leaving me with one month and two weeks left I guess.

My Raya went uneventfully, what with me being unwell on the day before Raya so I didn't help out with the preparation much. And we didn't even go anywhere to visit the relatives like usual, cz my grandma is unwell too but we still managed to meet everyone nevertheless, cz everyone came and visit. The strings of people really made me and my siblings cried (cz we have to, like, wash the glasses and top up the condiments non-stop LOL) each string came with like 20 people lol but yeah it's Raya so you really can't complain but be grateful instead that you have so many relatives. One of my relatives I found out is a doctor in Pasir Gudang and she got only 2 days off for Raya and I started to imagine my life like hers later, then and there. (My mum is handling the news like a breeze haha though she keep on saying that it's okay cz she have many more children to be with her on Raya- a lil bit too much that I think she's actually dreading the day I'm unable to be home for Raya.)

What else.

And the usual question of "When are you getting married?" haha. My grandpa cannot see me carrying any of my younger cousins without blurting "I think it's time for me to have great grandchildren" in my face LOL. I had prepared for a counter attack though, I keep saying do pray for me to get married to someone who's nice lol tho they kinda hate the answer cz it lacks juiciness and they wanna tease me more about me having no one in my life right now grrr.

So that's that! And since my siblings' Raya hols are over, I'm left at home, alone, with the old loving couple aka. my parents who always have some business (or dating) to do, leaving me all forever alone at home stuffing my face with kuih raya in front of the big TV. I'm not gonna be jobless for long. Next week I'm going to Kota Kinabalu and I really can't wait!!!!! :D

Till then. ;)